It’s all about

I’ve just finished a book by Jean Twenge called The Narcissism Epidemic (co-authored by W Keith Campbell).  Although not written from the worldview of a Christ follower, she gives wonderful insight into this generation.  A shorter version with as much helpful information by her is Generation Me.  Keeping in mind the language and examples are going to be from a secular worldview, this is a good read.

A couple of things stuck out to me.  Things that can help any parent trying to raise children to have a servant’s heart and  not narcissistic.  I wish I had done more of these with my children because I see in them glaring narcissistic traits.

Teach them to be grateful for everything.  Not only the please and thank you of courtesy but being thankful for their clothes, food, family, etc.  Teach them that they are not special, they cannot do things without other people’s help.  When they become selfish or greedy, remind them that someone else provided the desired thing for them, they didn’t acquire it because the were so smart, athletic, talented, good-looking, etc.  Help them understand all they have been given is a gift.  You know as well as I, that in this economy the things we take for granted can disappear with the appearance of one little pink slip of paper.

We are fast approaching the Thanksgiving holiday (which most will treat lightly).  Between now and then have your children daily write out one or two things they are truly grateful for and put them in a container.  Help them understand the benefit of the particular thing.  Then on Thanksgiving Day, have them write notes or letters of thanksgiving to the person or organization that supplied that item.  The idea here is to have them begin to verbally express thanks to those around them  for what they have.  From Thanksgiving Day on, use a couple of those items to begin your family prayer time.  This reinforces to them that we owe all our thanks to God.

If you can ingrain this into your children as a habit, then in adulthood they won’t be just another person in this generation of “it’s all about me”. They will stand out as models of “it’s all about God and others”.